I don't know why this happens but every time I have completed a major project in one of my theology classes (this week it was an oral presentation in front of rolling cameras on the Book of Numbers) I can't get to sleep at a normal time for about three nights thereafter. This is especially true when it feels as though I just haven't done enough to even get a passing grade yet I get kudos from the teacher or fellow classmates. I think, on some level, I feel weird about receiving praise for something I've only coherently presented by the mere grace of God. If it weren't for his divine assistance, I'd be a blabbering idiot. Everything I produce is because of Him. I simply cannot take credit for any brilliance I may muster.
It is bothering me.
It is keeping me from getting to sleep.
I feel so inadequate and stoo-pid.
Guess it's time to get on my knees and pray: pray in thanksgiving, pray for more help, pray for more grace.